Carefree, Confident, and BLACK.

Throughout my 19 years of living, I’ve always had a bubbly and vivacious personality. People always ask how I stay so positive and lighthearted in this society but honestly, its just natural. Living in today’s times, how could you not strive to be confident and carefree? If you’re a lil’ lost on how to walk in your confidence, here’s a few tips and tricks that work for me. Hopefully, you find something that works for you! Its nothing like a beautiful person with a beautiful soul to match.


Ok, as a huge advocate for the arts I can’t stress the importance of music enough. Music, in my opinion, is the cheapest form of therapy there is. What you listen to can subconsciously influence your emotions. Like, when you’re going through a breakup and you pop in some Adele to really feel your emotions and cry even more. Or like when you and your friends are stepping out, so y’all throw on some Destiny’s Child to get into the mood. OR maybe you’re just having a bomb day so you throw on some Kirk Franklin to enhance your mood even more! Music can influence your emotions whether you see it or not. So, to get confident, listen to some upbeat and positive tunes. Something you can groove to in the car and as you go about your day.


I can’t stress this enough, YOUR CIRCLE IS VERY IMPORTANT. Surround yourself with people that have potential and can motivate you. If you’re constantly around people with no morals and no motivation, its likely to rub off on you. With that being said, also surround yourself with people you enjoy being around. If you notice that people start to be a hindrance to your prosperity, LET THEM GO. Let that hurt go sis. The train to success has no room for dead weight.


This is another way to build yourself up or restore confidence. Spend some time with yourself, go on a date with yourself, maybe sit in a dark room and just think. This gives you time to learn about yourself with no distractions. I usually do this by laying in bed with no electronics around and listening to silence. (Its usually followed by a nap but that’s not the point) In this time, think about your future or what you plan to accomplish in the next few hours. Maybe go as simple as thinking about what your next meal will consist of. Just think and discover more about yourself.


An educated people, is a progressive people! Another key, is being just that, educated. Google is too big of a search engine for people to still see Martin Luther King, Jr. and Rosa Parks as the only leaders in black history. Although, they played a vital role in progression, they weren’t the only ones there. Educate yourself on the past to help bring about change to the future. Knowing people like, W.E.B. DuBois, John Lewis, Fannie Lou Hamer, Marsha Johnson, and several others. Learning about our past is what can bring stability. Its important to be aware, or woke. Be carefree, not careless.


Just live your life. Its simple. Stop thinking about what the next person is thinking about you. Learn to live unapologetically and be you. This is one of the greatest ways in which you can achieve complete confidence and carefreeness. Its not going to happen overnight, it’s a process. A process worth going through.

Stay true to yourself to be your best self.

From one millennial to another,

Benjamin Coy


One thought on “Carefree, Confident, and BLACK.

  1. That’s saying it, son! You really have a formula for lifelong success. Live it!Love it!
    Be loving! Be free! You inspire me❤️


What's on your mind?

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s